In this episode of the UnCapped podcast, host Chris Sands met with Christa and Brian Mitchell, founders of Pariah Brewing Co. in Baltimore. They talked about the beginning of the brewery, where its name came from, their newly opened Baltimore taproom, and how operating taprooms on opposite coasts will work. Following the podcast, Sands asks a litany of “stupid questions.” Here are the responses.
UnCapped: Do you wash apples before eating them?
Brian: No. God made dirt, and dirt don’t hurt.
Christine: Yes. I wash fruit.
UnCapped: What are the best fast food french fries? Defend your answer.
Christine: In-N-Out. Pet-style.
UnCapped: In-N-Out was my only disappointment when I went to California. Everything about the place was trash. Growing up and living my entire life on the East Coast, you hear people talk about how amazing In-N-Out is, how great In-N-Out is. That was on my list of things I had to do the first time we went out there. In-N-Out’s trash.
Christine: It’s about the sauce on them. I would say though, being here, Thrasher’s fries are something else.
UnCapped: Well, your answer’s wrong. What about yours, Brian?
Brian: I’m gonna go Arby’s curly fries.
Brian: And I don’t even like Arby’s. But the curly fries are amazing.
Christine: I like Checker’s fries, too. They’re seasoned well.
Brian: Five Guys is good, too. The Cajun fries.
UnCapped: What would the title of your biography be?
Christine: That’s a difficult one. I don’t want to be rude to myself. Mine would be “Neurotic Cat Mom.” And I mean that complimentary.
Brian: Mine would be “Is It Over Yet?”
UnCapped: Who would win in a battle between a ninja and a pirate?
Christine: I think I’m gonna go ninja. I don’t think pirates move that fast.
UnCapped: Guns and cannons and swords. Is Batman a ninja?
Christine: Don’t even get us started on Batman. We’re a huge Batman family, and I think he’s all of the above. He’s also an eccentric billionaire, so he can be anything he wants to be.
UnCapped: What is the scariest movie you’ve ever watched?
Christine: “The Exorcist.”
Brian: “The Exorcist.” Still scares me. And “Jaws.”
Christine: He does not like the ocean.
UnCapped: Neither do I, but it’s because of the sand.
Brian: You’re scared of the sand? Wait till you get in the water. There’s way scarier things waiting for you, buddy.
UnCapped: What’s scarier: aliens or clowns?
UnCapped: Flats or drumsticks?
Christine: Do I know what this is? I just started eating meat again.
Christine: I’ll reassess.
UnCapped: Name a famous person you’d love to meet.
Brian: I’m gonna call Jim Carrey to be a wrong answer.
UnCapped: I feel like he would be so annoying and insufferable.
Christine: Have you heard him speak lately?
UnCapped: Yeah, that’s part of the insufferable part.
Christine: I do also agree with Brian that Jack Nicholson is a great answer.
UnCapped: Yeah, I’ll give that one a correct answer. What are you watching on TV right now?
Brian: Nothing. I don’t think there’s anything good on TV right now.
Christine: We could use recommendations. Our two favorite shows are “Mad Men” and “Boardwalk Empire.”
UnCapped: What is the worst concert you’ve ever been to?
Christine: That Marilyn Manson one. Marilyn Manson went downhill.
UnCapped: That was one of the best concerts I’ve ever been to. He opened for Nine Inch Nails. It was actually a Nine Inch Nails concert. I didn’t even know who Marilyn Manson was at the time, so imagine my shock when he comes out onstage.
Christine: And it was probably awesome—at the time.
UnCapped: Oh, yeah, it was amazing.
Christine: That’s the thing. We’ve seen him great, and we’ve seen him awful. He was drunk onstage.
Brian: It was irritating because how can you be so good, and then to see him [like that], it was like: Bro, I paid money for this. You clearly haven’t been to practice, like, at all. You don’t know your own lyrics, you’re falling down … get some help.
Christine: Later in his career, it was like, OK, your career is over.
UnCapped: Is it acceptable to use a gift card on a first date?
Christine: Yeah, I think it’s honest. Who doesn’t want to use a gift card?
Brian: It’s kind of like going out to eat crabs for your first date. If she’s not into it…
Christine: If you’re not ready for that reality…
UnCapped: That’s a good test — wings or crabs … it’s gonna get real.
Brian: Yeah, something where you know it’s gonna get dirty. If they’re into that, they’re probably a keeper.